Compass..

So I just watched a movie today, “Pirates of the Caribbean 1 &3” and as I was watching there was something that caught my attention and hit me… If you have seen all three you will know about Jacks Compass. It is quite a concept when you think about it. His compass points to what he wants the most. There is a lot going on in the second and third movies but part of it deals with Jack and his compass. He is so conflicted that he has no idea what he wants. There is so much that he wants that he can’t decide what the thing he wants the most is.
How often do we feel that way? How often do I feel that way? Half of the time I want so much that I don’t know what I want the most… I have so many desires and dreams that sit on such a large scale, but I have so many everyday whims and wishes that distract me from the bigger picture… I get distracted so easily. So many times my compass is not sure and steady but instead spinning in circles… and when it finally starts pointing straight I am walking in the wrong direction…
I think of it as trying to get my independence. I can’t stand people telling me what to do… and so I end up doing the opposite of what they are telling me, sometimes this works out good and other times it does not. I don’t know why I am the way that I am… I trust no one but myself… but I have gotten myself into so much trouble… most of my problems come from my lack of trust… the only problem is that I never know who to trust. Everyone seems to want my trust but only a few of the people I end up trusting deserve it… I don’t understand why I do, but I do…
So I guess the jist of it is that I really am a confusing/complicated/unexplainable person… even I don’t understand me… and believe me, it frustrates me as much as it does you…